Friday, August 20, 2010

I Followed Instuctions - So Why Am I Being Badgered?

To Badger: to harass or urge persistently; pester; nag (please hold this definition for later use)
Last night Fay and I were enjoying an eclectic dinner of hot dogs, crab stuffed mushroom caps, baked potatoes and pickles while watching the hot vampires and the not-so-hot werewolves fight on The Gates when there was a vigorous knocking on the door. Hoping it is another Baby Shower gift for Mimi (a girl can dream), I went to the door to be confronted by a census worker.
"I sent in my census months ago I stated." She said she knew but the people in the condo next to me did not. And how is that my problem? Then the barrage of questions came: When will they be back? Do you know their names? Are they on vacation, as we were here earlier today and they we not at home either?
To which I responded in my most non-smart ass voice I could muster - I don't know when they will be back. Last time I looked (and not closely), none of them wore an ankle monitor that I was in charge of tracking. No, I don't know their names, we say hello in the hall, but we are not BFFs. I don't know if they are on vacation. If you were here only 6 hours ago, maybe they are at work!!!!
After a another round of assaulting questions, in which Fay giggled from inside the condo, while I gave her the finger behind my back, the census worker said she was done and then she proceeded to hand me a confidentiality notice. I am sure the extensive knowledge (or lack there of) of my neighbors was Top Secret.
I was finally able to lock the door, shoo away the crazies and get back to my vampires and werewolves!

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