Monday, January 31, 2011

Cliques at Jazzercise

I have noticed that there are different types of people that attend Jazzercise. There are at least 5 cliques (almost like high school).

There are the "normals" which I consider myself part of. I go to class because I need the exercise. I participate, I count off my hour, and then I go home.

Then there are the "peppies." These people are just annoying. No matter how early it is, they have energy oozing from their pores, and look very put together. They make me want to smack them.

There are the "hard cores." They take 2 or 3 classes in a row and never break a sweat. They make me feel really out of shape.

There are the "interpretative dancers." These people dance to their own music in their head. They do not follow the instructor and seem like they should be in a creative dance class instead of a structured Jazzercise class. They are the least annoying though, watching them makes me laugh and takes my mind off the remaining minutes of class that I still have to survive.

Then there are "The Others" - the old man in his spandex pants, the woman who always shows up late to class, the people wearing spandex that really shouldn't. The seem a bit like me, just trying to survive :)!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Leave Well Enough Alone

My Very Earnest Mother Just Served Us Nine Pickles - this mnemonic was how I learned my planets (Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto). That is until the International Astronomical Union on August 24, 2006 decided that Pluto was not a planet, but a dwarf planet. WTF???? I don't think once you become a planet, you should be downgraded. For 76 years, it had been good enough to play with the big kids. What gives? What becomes of my mnemonic? My Very Earnest Mother Just Served Us Nothing? Not a good idea.

As if this was not enough, when I was in school, we learned there were 4 oceans - the Atlantic, Pacific, Indian and Arctic. But in 2000, another strangely odd organization, the International Hydrographic Organization, decided another ocean (the Southern Ocean) was necessary. How do you expect parents to help their children with their school work? Maybe I will form an organization, create an ocean called The Michelle and start a campaign to have it taught in school. If others can do it, why not me?

More madness today - zodiac signs are changing. Apparently, your zodiac sign corresponds to the position of the sun relative to constellations as they appeared over 2200 years ago! A phenomenon called precession (blah, blah, blah) has altered the position of the constellations we see today. So astronomers decided that the new signs are:

Capricorn - Jan 20 to Feb 16
Aquarius - Feb 16 to Mar 11
Pisces - Mar 11 to Apr 18
Aries - Apr 18 to May 13
Taurus - May 13 to Jun 21
Gemini - Jun 21 to Jul 20
Cancer - Jul 20 to Aug 10
Leo - Aug 10 to Sep 16
Virgo - Sep 16 to Oct 30
Libra - Oct 30 to Nov 23
Scorpius - Nov 23 to Nov 29
Ophiuchus - Nov 29 to Dec 17
Sagittarius - Dec 17 to Jan 20

My birthday is March 10th and I have been a Pisces all my life. Now you are telling me I am an Aquarius, I don't think so! They added a new sign - the Ophiuchus. How do you even pronounce that? If a guy asks you your sign, is this really how you want to respond??

So please, stop changing fundamental facts that I grew up with. People need to know what they learned in school is still real!