Well we talked about the basics before, no alcohol, stupid people making comments that they should really keep to themselves and unexpected alien movements. But as the time ticks down (less than a month to go), let me tell you a few more of my pet peeves.
First of all, what is with the feet swelling? I am still exercising, I am still walking around, why does water seem to accumulate - I have permanent cankles! Really, you would think I was drinking 10 gallons of liquid a day. On top of that, note to self, dropping a pineapple can from the highest shelf in the kitchen onto your foot does not help matters.
Next up, incessant, useless Dr. visits. Please tell me why it is OK to keep me waiting 20 - 40 minutes to tell me how many weeks pregnant I am and to tell me I have gained more weight. I am acutely aware of how pregnant I am and they have these inventions called scales that are miracles of modern technology. Also, I can get up off the exam table (see above, I still do sit-ups at exercise class), I do not need your assistance. Maybe there are other lazy a**es out there who enjoy hanging out at the doctor's office, but I am not one of them!
I want to be able to paint my toe nails without feeling like I hiked a set of stairs - in July when I was home, I conned my sister into painting my toe nails. She thought I could not reach toes and she agreed to it, but got mad when she realized I could reach my feet when I applied the clear coat myself. I was just being lazy and wanted to be pampered. Now I could use some help, where are you Kiki?
Wardrobe - really it needs to say above 65 until Mimi is born. I have no pants that fit, only skirts and capris and I don't need frost bite waiting for her to arrive. That would just be the icing (pun intended) on the cake!
The nursery is ready, Tom is infant CPR certified and we are off to Daddy Boot Camp and Mommy Survival classes this weekend. Now, we just need you to hurry up and come hang out with us!
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