Another Crazy Night in the City

Well for my last night in White Plains, Amanda, Jamie and I decide to go see the play "39 Steps" at the New World Stages Theater. We met at Grand Central where I had just ate the most expensive club sandwich of my life at Cipriani Dolci for $19.95. This experience left me cheated. In what universe, does a club sandwich not have bacon? Well apparently is this hoighty - toighty world, a "club" sandwich (I use the term lightly) is really a chicken salad sandwich. As I said, I was pissed and unsatisfied.

We stepped out into the oven that is Manhattan and started our quest for a taxi. Apparently, taxi stands at Grand Central are really rickshaw stands and there is no such thing as a true taxi stand. As Amanda and I played Frogger, back and forth across the street, it took us 25 minutes to get a cab up to the theater.

The theater was really a warehouse with 5 theaters all showing plays at the same time. We should have known we would be in for a treat when some of the other plays playing were Avenue Q (the porno puppet show), the Gazillion Bubble Show and Naked Boys Singing. We headed to the basement, the land of no cell phone reception, secured some overpriced snacks and took our seats.

First up, the man in front of us had huge hairy plumber crack. Eyes could not divert as the train wreck continued to get up and down several times through out the night. Next up, the 2 girls who crawled across to their seats, sat for 5 seconds, crawled back across up and were never seen again. Then, we had the prerequisite old couple who decided that the row and seat numbers on their tickets were just recommendations and proceeded to take people seats and then act shocked when the true ticket holders arrived and demanded them to get the f*ck out of their seats.

This was not Broadway. There were no elaborate sets. There were 4 people playing 150 characters, transforming props from 1 thing to another. There were references to other Hitchcock plays, there was a plane chase scene that involved planes on a stick diving and weaving chasing a stick man on a horse. But at least it was memorable!